Heading out of the center of the universe

Now my story about Houston follows along the same lines as that about Dallas so don't think you are in for many surprises. Visiting Portuguese family seems to be like this, you get so content with the company and the food that you never actually do anything.

It was my intention to go to NASA Space Center, but as I mentioned above, the opportunity just passed me by and we ended up just hanging out with the cousins instead, playing basketball in the front yard, or talking a load of BS in the kitchen while drinking gallons and gallons of milk. I believe here they think it'll bring eternal life, because in one weekend in Houston we drank 4 gallons of milk. Thats 4 x 4 gallons for you metric system users out there.

I would definitely say the highlight of my weekend was Celia telling everyone we were going to watch a 69'ers game in Atlanta when we all know that its actually the 76'ers, or just 6'ers, and 69'ers is something different entirely.

According to the new road trip itinerary I had had created in Dallas to try and stop us wasting too much time in one place, especially when we get staying with family, we should have left on Sunday after church, but it was another case of the women in my life forcing my hand, so we only left on Monday. This at least gave me one more day to wallow in Chris and my Pictionary success of Saturday night. I believe they call it a gift.



Coming back to the church I just mentioned. It was really something else, Joel Osteen has his ministry based in Houston. The church there is the old Houston Rockets basketball arena, seating (according to Google) about 16k people, so when you arrive there not expecting it, the jaw dropping moment is quite special.

When Monday arrived, we sadly bid farewell to the crazy cousins and headed out of the 'center of the universe' as they call it. We were off to New Orleans, LA

San Antonio

We left Dallas a little sad but excited about our next leg of the trip. Off to San Antonio, TX which according to most is the prettiest town in Texas. Can't wait, as Dallas is not your average Mona Lisa. The plan was to stop off in Waco and Austin on route, but we were running late as usual and got stuck in rush hour traffic which forced us to go straight through. It's a pity as Austin is the capital city and the home of Lance Armstrong with a Capitol (no spelling error) building as beautiful as the one in Washington, DC.

Well we were happy enough in San Antonio with its fantastic buildings, taking a leisurely trip down the river walk and learning of it's importance in Texan history with the battle of the Alamo.

The Battle (and siege) of the Alamo took place at the Alamo Mission in San Antonio, Texas (then known as "San Antonio de Béxar") in February and March 1836. The battle was between the Republic of Mexico and the rebel Texian forces, including both Whites and Blacks (from the United States) and Tejanos (Mexicans in Texas), during the Texians' fight for independence — the Texas Revolution. The 13-day siege started Tuesday, February 23, 1836, and ended on Sunday, March 6, 1836, with the capture of the mission and the death of nearly all the Texian and Tejano defenders, except for a few slaves, women and children. Despite the win, the 13-day holdout stalled the Mexican Army, and allowed Sam Houston to gather troops and supplies for his later success at the Battle of San Jacinto. The Texian revolutionaries went on to win the war.

With the history lesson over we went through to Seaworld, San Antonio where Celia was going to have what they call in this part of the world an "experience" with the Beluga whales. This involves going in the water with them, feeding them, doing tricks, etc.. she had been looking forward to it for a week or so since we had found out about it, so when we arrived and Seaworld was closed for a few days, there was a bit of disappointment hanging in the air. Celia did take it well in the end and even better once we had bought some new clothes.

Off to Houston to visit the crazy Prima.

Dallas in a nutshell

When we arrived in Dallas we did the same thing we tend to do whenever we find a comfy bed to rest our head, sleeeeppp. It also helped that it rained for more than a day which tends to keep me on the couch watching sports, college basketball this time round.

We were slowly starting to meet all of Omar's brothers, four of them to be exact - plus one sister. Each of them with an amazing character. Ozzie and all his stories about Africa; Odi has his 6 beautiful daughters, Osi is hunting mad and has his 17 guns plus more knives, torches and everything for the outdoors; Orlando, well he is the oldest and more mature which just leaves Omar himself who is the BS'ing champion of the US and even gives me a run for my money. Not forgetting there's the sister Odilette, who doesn't need 3 sisters to match the crazy of the brothers - she has it all in one basket.

All the family was going to be up in Dallas for easter which also happened to be (according to Celia) our six month anniversary. So embarrassingly they threw a party for us on the Saturday where I was forced to display my talents on the BBQ.

All in all it was a great week spent in Dallas, we went through to Fort Worth to see cowtown and it's longhorns, Cabellas outdoor store which is pretty much like heaven is intended to be, then to the Texas Motor speedway where they were testing some Indy Cars. This is pretty exciting watching them tear around the oval track with the methane fumes rushing through your senses every time they are near. I would now love to go watch oval track racing.

The icing on the cake for Celia was a visit to Southfork Ranch where they filmed the hit TV series Dallas. Fortunately I am young enough not to have remembered being put through all of that dribble, so I just came along for the BS'ing. Turns out they never filmed any of the indoor scenes in the at house, they were all done on a set in LA, so they cheekily take you on a tour of the inside of the house which has nothing to do with the show..... It was still fun for all those interested to see the pool area and the outside shots of the house as used in the series. Celia made us pose for a couple painful pictures around the breakfast table and pool having a Dallas style cat fight. We'll let the pictures will tell the whole story.

And before I forget, we also went to downtown Dallas via all of the sports stadiums present and the ones they are building, finally stopping off where they assassinated JFK, I am too a believer in the conspiracy theories and he was indeed picked off by the Republicans who never fancied that Democratic candidate/actor too much.

It was sad to say goodbye to all the brothers and Prima Theresa, but we would catch up with Odilette and her sons again in Houston. Being around all of the Portugeezeers with their big families made me realise that a large family would be nice and not such a burden at Christmas time, so watch this space.

The gorgeous drive to Dallas

Had I known that the Arizona countryside was some of the most picturesque we would see for a while, I would have paid more attention. As we made our way into New Mexico, enjoying watching the dust storms in the distance, I worked on my Air drumming and my drive-dancing which has evolved quite a lot since I managed to operate the cruise control.

What was a great drive turned into a very boring one as the highway patrolmen kept us at standstill on the motorway for more than two hours as there were high winds in the area. This left us with little confidence for our tent which had already suffered two brutal wind storms, one in Kaikoura and the other in the Mojave desert. We did manage to get as far as Las Cruces, NM, where we found a place to stay for the night, most importantly - with HBO and breakfast.

We were in for a long day with our ETA in Dallas at 8pm, 10m hours on the road would not be joy ride. Now if you have ever driven down I-10 and 1-20 in Texas you will understand how little there is to see, so you even get excited when some tumbleweed comes blowing past.

My day was made when some state trooper on a power trip ticketed me for being a few miles over when there were clearly many cars flying past me. My downfall being the Georgia reg. I had in small town Texas. $180 thanks very much. I could not hold in my excitement, and along with the great scenery I was over the moon to be in Texas. I needed to get out that car badly and smash a few Shiner bock at Celia's cousins house. Only 3.5 hours to go.

Phoenix

I would like to tell you much about our trip to Phoenix and the lovely drive through Arizona, but it was largely uneventful. The highlights being the many tall cactus we saw along the road. I had to resort to air drumming to entertain myself which Celia found most amusing, she says my action is too stiff for a drummer. Well I am still learning.

We eventually managed to find a place to stay for the night just outside Phoenix on Lake Saguaro after many hours of frustrating driving. We had bought a patch to fix our hole in the tent, but all it managed to do was make it 5 times the size, so sleeping on the ground sheets was the only option once again and it made me pretty grumpy as i was starting to enjoy these creature comforts. Well nothing I experienced that evening could have matched the grumpiness shown by Celia (and me) when we realised before church on the Sunday that this campsite had no running water whatsoever, not even a tap. Well you should have seen the two of us walking into the majestic 'Phoenix First' church. Boemelaars is a word that comes to mind and I'm sure they must have thought we were perfect candidates to get saved. They had a fantastic easter production on and an easter egg hunt which was sadly only for children.

This actually got me thinking about the easter bunny hunt they have on in NZ every year where everyone goes out and, instead of finding eggs, shoots as many cute little bunnies as they can on the easter weekend. Only the Kiwis.

Grand Canyon

Now that we had done Vegas we could head out to the Grand Canyon and see what the rest of the world has been going on about for all these years. We headed out there towards sunset but our timing was off once again and what was meant to be a romantic stroll on the 'Sky Walk' turned out to be... well nothing, we were too late to enter the park. Once again we had to scramble to find a place to stay before nightfall - panic stations (for me). There was a little spec on the map nearby called Meadview which has been the smallest town (that existed on the map) we have seen in the U.S. Never found anywhere in the town to camp, but fortunately the owners at the video store knew exactly the place and little did we know it was the find of the trip.

Turns out Lake Mead dries up a fair bit over the winter so we were able to camp right in the basin where the lake meets the Grand Canyon. The reds, the oranges, yellows, greens and blues - apart from being the first four colours of the rainbow shone brightly across the canyon making for great viewing which still don't think our pictures will ever do it justice.

We headed back to town for dinner, indulging in Chicken Fried Steak (steak fried like chicken in crumbs), rib-eye, and a jug of Sam Adams, making my driving back to the canyon basin in the night more auto pilot than anything else.

My evening of fun and games was not to end so well as when we got back to the tent our inflatable mattress was no longer inflatable as it had a big fat hole in it thanks to me, it seems that in my quest to achieve the ultimate night's sleep, I went slightly overboard. Try as I might, the piece of gum I was chewing did not block the hole either, so much for all the years of watching McGyver, you big liar. It was back to the ground sheets and the cold hard floor.

Vegas

We drove all day through these little dorpie's scattered all over the desert, crossing the Hoover dam, stopping for a couple quick pictures. As we passed over the last mountain range before the road down to the city, Vegas came into view and it sticks out like a sore thumb in the desert, something definitely not meant to be there.

Approaching the strip from the south you first past Mandalay Bay with it's golden reflective glass windows, then the Luxor with its great glass pyramid, 'New York New York', the MGM Grand and the golden lion in front of it, right through to the iconic Bellagio, Caesers Palace, the Mirage, plus many truly beautiful structures right up until one of the oldest Casinos on Las Vegas boulevard, Circus Circus.

Now Celia and I had been trying for days to get online and book a hotel in Vegas but had no luck finding an Internet Cafe so we were left to stay in a dodgy 'Motel 8' room. Not the greatest way to do Vegas, but at least it was opposite the Mandalay Bay and easy access to all the hotels and casinos.

After washing up and putting on our best evening wear (jeans and trainers) we headed out for dinner.Smith and Wollensky's was the target but the menu denied us outside the restaurant. Neither of us wanted to pay $45 for a steak no matter how hungry we were. I was pretty pleased as I was here for the buffet. You don't

a) Go to Vegas without having a legendary buffet

or

b) Get an ample stomach like mine without having had a couple buffet's in your life before

We opted then for the buffet at the Bellagio as we wanted to go there anyway, me because I had seen it on 'Ocean's 11' and Celia - well I'm not to sure. The way into the hotel is truly spectacular as you pass the lake with the musical fountains, the entrance hall with the glass flowers hanging from the ceiling. I personally was looking for the signs to the buffet and only spotted the flowers due to that.

Well all I can say is that I had to pray for forgiveness that night for being such a glutton. We rolled out of there and try as we might, couldn't even suck in our stomachs. Now when you load your plate at a buffet, the items you choose have not earthly place in being there together. On my plate I had turkey, Alaskan king crab legs, potato strudel, prime rib, sashimi, california rolls - and that was just the first plate.

The key with a buffet is stay way from the carbs, the rices, potatoes, breads, etc. They will fill you up. I perfected this technique about 7 or 8 years ago when I went to Namibia and Celia's cousin, Mauro and I had 12 plates of the most fantastic buffet at the Kalahari Sands hotel. Job done.

With the food out the way, we attempted to walk around town which was actually a good thing as I don't believe we would have manage with our bellies so full. The casinos are all as beautiful as the next and although I would love to stay at one and be spoiled for the time I'm there, I'm not much of a gambler, and there is not much else to do in Vegas. Maybe I'm just a bit biased as I am on a budget trip. Put a wad of cash in my pocket and we'll talk again. I did gamble the $20 I did have in my pocket and sad to say it lasted a whole 3 minutes in which they never saw me gambling and I never got free drinks like the rest that were sitting there.....

Today in Boulder city I went online to see how much you can get a hotel in Vegas for if you book it on lastminute.com. The answer, about $80-$100, a bit more than we paid for a motel, but then again, in a hotel you don't get the waterproof mattress protector or the dirty towels. :( If we knew we would be in Vegas that day and had internet access, we would have def booked a hotel that day. Lesson learned.